The Big Block of (SARCASM)Writing

Who here gets writers block on a daily basis?

I’m sure nobody does. I mean, a real dedicated author NEVER gets writers block… like, never. They’re way too mature and experienced to get writers block. Now, if you’re a new author, that’s when you get writers block. However, if you brave the storm, then it’ll be smooth sailing from then on. You’ll never have trouble again! Super cool, right?

No.

There is so much no-ness to the above statement that I can’t even.

Writers block is a fact, and it comes in all shapes and sizes, whether to a play or a novel or a small children’s book.

Oh, but Selene, you say, I don’t have writers block! I’m just a little stuck at the moment, but I know that everything will be okay… much like this weird font that will be fixed by the end of this post!

Again, no. Getting stuck is called writer’s block. It’s a block, a poor excuse for a beaver’s dam that blocks your flow of creativity and awesomeness. Also, when normal, this font is awesome.

Duly noted. Never put this font in italics.

Who are you?

My name is Scarlet Holmes.

Ah, kids. That’s something else I’ve definitely been meaning to tell you about… character development and how to recognize what character to use and how and when and why. But that will be for a different post… not today, folks. Not today.

What were we talking about again? Oh, yes. Writer’s block. It called be a real pain in the butt, can’t it? it comes in many shapes and sizes… writer’s block, painter’s block, moonblock, magicjam, life’s block… there’s so much blocking. So much.

So, how do you deal with it?

Here’s how:

You know how David defeated Goliath – this big wall of meat and blockage and probably some serious hygiene issues – with a stone that he could pick up and put in his slingshot?

Your defeat of writer’s block is kind of like that.

Goliath had a big mouth. So does your writer’s block-wall. So, how do you defeat it?

“With words.”

*gasp* with words? I’m supposed to defeat writer’s block with the words it’s blocking me from?

You see, the thing about writer’s block, it’s like Smaug with the weak point in his scales. The only way to defeat a shiny money dragon with lots of money was with an arrow that was worth about as much money as Bilbo. Likewise (samwise lol) we must defeat this writer’s block by defying it! We must write on, no matter the wall we face! And with the right choice of words, a neatly typed paragraph or maybe a shaky sentence, we will send the wall crumbling down and chop its head off with its own sword!

Okay… maybe too far. But, you know… don’t use your only son as a prop for your words. It worked in a movie. Not necessarily in real life.

DON’T PONDER THAT SENTENCE.

 

Signing off,

~Selene Silver

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